Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Why I Felt Guilty on My Summer Vacation

Who's been a busy little Tuna Girl?

Oh, right. That'd be me.

Actually, I've spent an inordinate amount of time in front of the television or behind a book lately, but I've been doing fun things too.

This summer is quickly coming to an end for me. And I am staggered by the amount of guilt I'm suddenly feeling.

I always do this.

I take time for me, I do something fun, I spend time away from my kids, and then I feel like the worst mother ever.

It's funny what will trigger this feeling. Last week, Patrick and I went to Six Flags Over New England. As he says it, we started our summer at an amusement park and we're finishing it at one too.

I don't really feel bad about not taking the kids. They're too short for most of the rides and they get hot very easily. Besides, when Patrick gets in roller coaster mode, it is not a pretty sight. I have to beg him to stop and eat.

But I took a trip to the ladies' room at one point, and there was a little girl in there with the same sneakers as my daughter.

Oh, guilt!

I should have brought my kids. We didn't need to ride any roller coasters. We didn't need to spend the day checking out cute guys. We could have watched them go around on the kiddie rides over and over again.

Never mind that my parents have taken them to Storyland, to the beach, for boat rides, to movies, for fire station tours, and any where else their little hearts desired (including the waffle place every morning).

I never took them on the whale watch or the dune tours or the treasure hunt or the children's theater.

This summer flew by and I wasted so much of it.

But I have three more days left. And Patrick has them mostly off. It's the first time he's had two days off in a row this summer.

So I'm going to stop complaining about visiting my summer home, hanging out with my best friend, having round the clock babysitters, and having more adult fun than I've had in years. And I'm going to enjoy my last three days.

Driving 28 hours with two kids and a dog can be my penance.

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