Love You Guys

Yesterday, I told my friend CB that I loved her.

This is pretty out-of-character for me. Not when I'm with my husband and kids, though. With them I'm very affectionate and vocal with my love. But with friends, extended family, even my parents, I'm just not an "I love you" kind of girl.

Until now.

I don't know what it is. My mother had been full of I-love-you's lately too. Maybe it is a realization that there is so much bad stuff in this world, and I'm so lucky to be as happy and loved as I am.

Take Sebastian, for example, of Holding the Man. I only recently started reading his work on the group blog Event Horizon. But you can tell right away from Sebastian's writing that he is a very special man. I checked out Holding the Man a few times before my surgery. And then yesterday, I read the awful news.

It seems that Sebastian was run down by a car. It seems like a hate crime too. Sebastian is in a coma.

Just when I was starting to think that this particular brand of hate was a very American thing, someone has to go and in the worst possible way, show us all otherwise. Hate, ignorance, and violence are worldwide and growing (it seems). And the only way to combat that is to grow love, education, and peace worldwide too.

And I'm starting right here at home.

There is so much more. Death. Sickness. Suicide. Losing love. Losing jobs. Losing humanity.

There is even sending your love to the desert to do his duty for his country.

Everyone has a sphere of influence. Some are spread far and wide, through media or policy, or even an Internet community of faithful readers. And some are more contained to family and friends and the people we love.

And as of now, today, this very moment the people in my sphere are going to be learning a lot about how much I love them. And they'll be learning as much as I can teach about tolerance, whether it be through example ("Yes, Mom, he is my friend and he is a gay man.") or through lectures when appropriate.

Let's face it. It won't change much. But it might change a little. And my love is really the only thing I have to give.

But I think it is worth a hell of a lot.