Enough with the Surgery Already

Can you guys tell that I'm trying really hard not to be pitiful?

I was just wondering if it showed.

I've decided that for the moment, self pity is good for me. It helps me acknowledge that I'm not superhuman, and it garners either sympathy or pity. Both of which I'll take right now.

Being pitiful in the blog is also better than the alternative, letting the kids get on my last nerve and yelling at them. Which I was this close --><-- to doing last night. At about 5:30 I was wondering if all three of us would survive until their 7 o'clock bed time.

Life has just brought me one anoying thing after another in the last few days. And I've responded by binge eating. Because we all know that putting on weight will make me feel so much better.

But the truth is that I'm nervous. I'm really, really nervous about my oral surgery today. Which is stupid because I wasn't even this nervous about my jaw surgery.

But when I had the jaw surgery my husband was here to take care of me (to the best of his ability) and my mother was here to take care of my kids. Today, RB will have the boy, AH will have the girl, and CB will have me. And that makes me so uncomfortable.

I've been known to cry uncontrollably after anestesia. I don't want CB to see that. I've also suddenly realized that she's going to be in my house and my car, both of which are a mess. She's a domestic goddess, and I barely get by without breaking health codes.

And then there is the fact that I'll be all on my own again by the kids' bed time. What if I can't handle it?

But I will. I always do. I'll probably be a royal bitch, but I'll get through it.

This sucks.

And to top it all off, I found a dead bird in my attic. On Friday. And it is still there. This is why I got married. Critter removal. So do I see hands for volunteers to fly in and remove my dead bird for me? Please. No? I should just grow a set and deal with it? Yeah. That's what I thought.