Monday, October 09, 2006

A Moral to the Story?

There is a reason I am a stay at home mom. And it is this:

I hate people.

People are apathetic, self-centered, and mean. And even when they are well-intentioned, they are stupid.

(Not you people, of course. You're all smart, beautiful, popular, and good.)

I've only been running these food booths for two days, and I've already wanted to smack more than a dozen people. Most especially, I wanted to smack my co-chair who went home with the golf cart key and left me walking from one end of the fairgrounds to the other carrying ten piping hot pizzas.

We thought it would be a good idea to post our phone numbers at the booths so that the stupid people would have someone to ask for help before they started breaking things on their own. But every morning I've had to field phone calls from people saying, "There's nobody here yet! There's no food cooked!"

People seem to want to have all the food cooked at ten in the morning for our 11 opening. Because customers just love old corn dogs, pizza, and hot dogs. Yummm.

Speaking of which, blech! I will never eat fair food again. My skin looks like I've been lubed up for a XXX All-Nude Foxy Wrestling match. Even my eyes stick shut from all the fryer grease. Can you imagine what that stuff does to your insides?

So, is there a moral to this story? Yes, and I believe it is this.:

I hate people. Oh, and nature. I hate nature. And puppies. Yup, hate them too.

I can't wait for October 16.

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