Tuesday, February 14, 2006

I Never

Have you ever played that drinking game?

The one where you say, "I never ________." And if you actually have done that thing, you must take a drink.

I've played it, well, a time or two. But I've only played it with actual alcohol once. (Was that the night I knocked a drink out of Patrick's hand while he was hitting on a pair of gorgeous blond guys?)

My college friends added a You Can't Fuck Your Friends rule to the game. In our version, you could only fill in the I Never blank with something that you had actually done.

Who wants to play?

I've never been tied to a bed.

I've never peed myself in public over the age of ten. (Or, um, twenty.)

I've never seen my roommate naked.

I've never pretended to be someone else online.

Who's drinking?

I could get a lot more wild with those, but you've heard it all before. And, theoretically, my husband reads this. And while he knows about all of my wild moments, some of them are better left unmentioned. There's no use in poking the nest.

But never is an interesting word.

There are so many things that I would never do.

I'd never cheat on my husband. I'd never hit my kids.

Those are absolutes. They really will never happen.

But some things I would claim to never do, may be possible given the circumstances.

I'd never jump out of an airplane. I'd never go hunting. I'd never lie to someone I love.

Suppose I end up on the Amazing Race. If I have to jump out of an airplane to win a million dollars to split with someone I love and trust enough to pair up with...well..I'll fucking do it. I'll hate it. But I'll do it.

Or who knows. Maybe I'll be on an aircraft that is going down. If it's jump or die, I'm going to jump.

And while I'd never willingly hunt for sport, if I was in a situation where I had to hunt to survive, I'd do that. Hell, after reading Alive, I'm pretty sure I'd eat people if I had to.

And as far as lying goes...I'd never choose to lie either. But I can foresee situations where it might be the noble, kind, and right thing to do.

Then there are the things that I've done, that I will swear I've never done.

I've never seen or felt a ghost.

Nope. No ghosts. Never. Uh uh. No ghost sightings here.

I've never snooped through someone else's things.

No way. I've never done that. That's awful. Who would do that?

Oh yeah. That's right. Me.

But the best "I nevers" are the things I never thought I would do. But have.

I never thought I'd hit an out-of-the-park home run. I did. And I loved it.

I never thought I'd go rafting on class five rapids. I have. And I loved it.

I never thought I'd own a fluffy, white, yippy, little dog named Buffy. I do. And I love her.

I never thought I'd be a military, stay-at-home wife. I am. And I love it.

I never thought I'd write about my life on the Internet. I never thought I'd meet people from the Web. I never thought I'd make some of the closest friends I've ever had through blogging. I have. And I love them.

It really makes you wonder. Doesn't it? What else am I never going to do? What else am I capable of?

How about you?

What would you never do?

Come on. Fill your glasses. (Coffee will do in a pinch.)

I never ______.

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