Friday, April 09, 2004

An Heir and a Spare

So I ask you. Why would anyone want more than two children? Two is really pushing the boundary, don't you think? I don't think the children in a family should outnumber the parents. That's just bad math.

I'm not really crazy about children. I know that sounds bad, since I have two. But as a wise mother once told me, "I hate other people's kids."

Admittedly, there are some lovely children out there. My best friend has two incredibly sweet children. And she tends to association with moms who also have wonderful children. She's my best friend, after all.

Today I took one of her children, and my own, to an Easter party, thrown by the most annoying friend I have. As well-behaved as all three of mine were, it was still one child too many. I became like a day care teacher. I kept counting heads to make sure all three were uninjured.

So I implore you. PLEASE. For the love of mike, and to lessen the burden on society...please stop having so many damn children! Two is plenty. Three is just selfish. Any more and you're starting your own little cult. You don't have a farm to work, people. Your excess children are not going to help you out while you audit taxes.

Stop the insanity.

**I'm sure the children and young relations of any of my readers are also lovely little additions to society.

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